Being unfaithful involves more than emotional or physical betrayal. Financial infidelity is fast becoming a major issue with couples today.

© Cherie Burbach

When most people think of “cheating” in a relationship they think of physical or even emotional unfaithfulness. However, financial infidelity is fast becoming an issue with today’s couples.

Definition of Financial Infidelity
Any lie or act of dishonesty with regard to money can qualify as financial infidelity. When one partner hides purchases from the other, lies about how much is spent on certain items, or takes money out of an account without telling the other person it could be a sign financial cheating.

Lying About Finances Hurts a Relationship
When couples are married or living together, they often pool their money and share expenses. Their money becomes an extension of themselves and a representation of their character. So when one partner goes against the agreed upon terms of financial boundaries, it breaks down the level of trust in the relationship.

Accumulative Lies Indicate a Problem
Lying in any form is bad for a relationship. It shows a lack of respect for the other person and an indication that the couple is not on the same page.

The occasional small white lie about finances is usually not enough to break the trust in a partnership, but when the lies continue to build, it could be a sign of a more serious problem. Each time one partner covers up spending issues it not only steals trust away from the relationship but also puts the other person on the line for money she didn’t plan on spending.

Different Ideas About Spending Could Mean Different Life Goals
Ideas on how to spend money are an important issue for couples. If one person continually spends money on the sly, while the other toils away to save, it could mean that the spender is putting him or herself above the goals of the relationship. The spender could deem future expenses such as retirement, college education, or home ownership as not important to his immediate wants.

Lying about finances takes cunning, covering up, and planning. It takes the same type of effort as for other types of infidelity, and involves the same hurtful lack of respect. If one partner is willing to lie about money, it may be just a matter of time before he begins to lie about other things. A betrayal involving money can be equally as hurtful as physical cheating and be much more difficult to get over.