I caught this article about an engaged gal who has a ticked off fiancé because she’s pals with her ex. I get this question a lot, too and have written an article on the ins and outs of staying friends with your ex. Being friends with an ex can be tricky business.

Here are a few situations where being friends with an ex can work:

• If you dated briefly and quickly realized the two of you weren’t right for each other. Relationships like this quickly transform from romance to friendship, and should pose no threat to any new relationship.
• If you dated a long time ago and recently met up again. This means time has (supposedly) healed any wounds or sore feelings. It also means the two of you can become friends in a more organic way. Rather than forcing a friendship, it happens naturally over time and doesn’t jeopardize your current relationship.
• If you ended your relationship on good terms (meaning both of you wanted to end it) and have behaved maturely. You both want the best for each other, and realize that can only happen with someone new.

If you try to force a friendship immediately after a breakup, it rarely works out. I know of a lot of couples where one person wants to break up, but the other doesn’t. The one that wants to break up says he or she wants to stay friends as a way to let the other person down easily (they think.) But what ends up happening is the couple still tries to hang out and act as if there aren’t feelings there. The person who breaks up always has the advantage in this situation, because they are in a sense keeping their ex on a string. Chances are a friendship like this won’t last. Even if it lasts for months or years, it will likely end when one of the people involved finds someone new.

Image: sxc.hu.

More dating resources:

• Get Your Online Profile in Order and Find Great Date Ideas – in one ebook
• Get Your Ex Bank
• Understand Your Man – Men Made Easy
• How to Attract Women